This is a weird space, the place I find myself in now. Everything has changed. It feels empty. Empty isn’t bad, it’s just different. I will need to gain balance and perspective of my new life. This is the first time I’ve felt a void and it’s an opportunity to do what I want to do in this world. I’m not living for others anymore.
This space is new and pristine of past obligations. I think of things – I don’t need to keep track of lovers anymore – haven’t for the last 39 years! Whew! The old place/space is gone.
I was looking at the moon tonight, like I did with Sheila Saturday when she took those awesome pictures and the arc of light shifted around the moon. I’ve got them and after looking at them these past few days I still can’t believe how the perspective and light show shifted. Look at the orb below the moon, it’s in all of the pictures, one way or another.
Is the lack of obligation to others an empty space? What do we do with freedom in our lives? I’ve always been obligated to one or another human being or animal. I’m not negating the value in that, but it’s a new place and space for me. One long overdue. I’ve felt entitled before, but that was just it. I was entitled, deserving. This new feeling is being, being true and obligated only to me. A new freedom. A new day.